Tightening the Belt

Last night, I had a conversation with my partner that made me really think. We had the "Financial State of the Union" talk. I feel like everyone is having this talk, and we had it later than some, earlier than some. I realized that a LOT of emotions were coming up-some were irrational fears, and other were very real. I wanted to let you know that there are ways you can take control of your finances and not live in this constant state of denial. It does mean several scary things, however: facing up to your real spending habits, looking at your actual debt, and subsequently tightening your belt to stop the bleeding. Here are some tips that I thought were helpful:

• Track every darn penny for one month. I mean it. Every cent. Everyone always talks about that morning latte, but the things I missed were silly: automatic payments from my checking, medical stuff like co-pays, and gas. Compile this list religiously. It will help you become more aware of spending, and we'll use this list to help us stop. Note any feelings that arise while writing this list. Were you scared? Excited? Nauseous?
• After a month, compile the list in an excel file. Check it out. Categorize the spending. Where is all of your money going? Most of mine cycles back into my business, oddly enough. This was emotional for me-where is it all going? Once I got a realistic look at how I was spending, I was then able to take action.
• Decide where to tighten. This was the hard part. Suddenly, I was a junkie going cold turkey. No more spending on these five things. No more plastic. And it's absolute, not like my diet where I can cheat. It's like that Saturday Night Live skit-"you mean if I want to buy something, I have to have the money to pay for it?". It's a novel idea, but one whose time has come.

Emotionally, this can all feel overwhelming, But it's interesting to me how our spending can mirror our internal emotional environment. Like, what else are we in denial about? Will being honest about our spending help us be honest about other things? Like all changes in life, this will take some getting used to. By cutting out the things we can live without, we realize and appreciate what we actually have.